Hello, everybody! Ah, victory! Mother McRee—hide the children! They shouldn’t see such a beating. Sometime around the sixth inning, I clearly heard Howard Cosell yelling, “Randall ‘Tex’ Cobb, for the love of God, please go down!” A team record for runs on opening day; eclipsing the 15 we (yeah, I’m gonna say ‘we’, what of it?) hung on the Mets in 2003. Yesterday was sweet, even though I could quibble about a couple of decisions. I was skeptical of going for the two-point conversion after both touchdowns, but you gotta make hay while the sun shines. The D-Backs narrowly escaped the ten run rule, while the Cubs were busy knocking balls to every corner. Walker even got a hit by smacking one off the first base bag. When things are going your way…let’s hope the Cub bats stay lively tonight.

I said I’d be watching to see if the 2005 copy of the Cubs could create runs. Maybe they read yesterday’s entry, and decided to show me. Yeah right, but if they did, I promise to challenge them everyday, if 16 runs with only two homers is going to be the result. Let’s have a look, shall we?

Patterson went 3 for 5 with a walk and 2 RBI. Todd Walker—3-4 with a RBI. Nomah! was 2 for 5, 2 RBI. Ramirez, apparently overjoyed at his new contract, went out and drove in 4, on a 3 for 4 day, he even scored 4. Lee knocked in 5, went 4 for 6 and Burnitz had a three hit day. 23 hits, only two were homers, and the classic create-a-run sequence in the first inning was a delight. Patterson with a single, and right away he tries to steal. Off to second on a wild pitch, then Walker drove a long one and Patterson actually tagged up! He made third easily, then Nomah! chops one down the third base line, and Patterson trots home. It seemed like last year, Patterson would have been too timid with his speed and not taken advantage of the chance to scoot to second. He would have been trapped at first when Walker lined out, and perhaps doubled at second on Nomah!’s chopper. Even if he beat the force, it’s a runner on second with two down. This year, it’s 1-0 Cubs with two down. Much better.

Only two walks, but when the bats are rockin’ with 23 hits, they’re getting on base.
Those days when the Louisville Sluggers seem to have holes in them are the days to really work the free pass. One through Six in the order went a combined 18 for 30, a healthy .600 clip, if my calculator is to be believed. Toss in the walks, and you’re looking at an OBP for the top six at .666. Woohoo!!! ‘Course, it helps to knock ‘em in once they get on. Ramirez and Lee had 9 RBI between them, enough to beat the D-Backs all by themselves. Six 2-out RBI was nice to see as well. I am tired of not getting runs in with two outs.

Burnitz made a nice grab on a long fly ball, back, to the track…now if he could work on how he wears his socks. Jeromy, you look like an orange on toothpicks! Sorry, but these are the kinds of things you get to talk about when your team wins 16-6.

And now, the Bullpen (dramatic organ chord), along with a quibble. Bake, ya couldn’t leave Z in for one more out? Bottom of the fifth, up 9-2, yeah, the bases are loaded. OK, so Zambrano walked in a run. 9-3, two outs, with the fearsome Chad Tracy coming to the plate. Why not give Z one more hitter, to qualify for the W? Were you trying to get him out of there before he imploded? Concerned about him going after the ump? By the way, Blue—class move. Eject the guy on his way to the showers. Why not just follow him to the parking lot, throw him out of the game while he’s getting on the team bus? Or maybe at dinner that night. Here’s a idea, catch Zambrano at I-Hop and eject him from the game while he’s enjoying those stuffed crepes. Fer cryin’ out loud! Anyway, I could hear Z yelling from the clubhouse, “I coulda done that!” when Rusch came in and got a fly ball to end the inning. Ah, but let’s not besmirch the victory with the stain of dissent at this point. We were discussing the bullpen.

Rusch gave up a couple, and walked 3 in two-and-a-third, but when you come into the game with a seven run cushion, that’s acceptable. Bartosh, the newest cubbie, threw a shutout inning with a K. Nice to have another lefty, eh? Wellemeyer finished it off by giving up fewer hits than he has e’s in his name, always a good thing.

While we’re talking about pitching, anybody know what’s up with Vazquez? Nice first half last year with the Yankees, then apparently, he got amnesia and forgot how to pitch. One-and-two-thirds yesterday, and he was bashed so hard he literally stumbled under the weight of his 37.8 ERA on the way to the dugout. When they came out to get him, it looked like he asked, “what took you so long?” but it could have been my imagination. They’re not booing, Vazquez…well, yes, they are. Sorry.

Yesterday was a great way to open the season. I’m still adjusting to the new TV crew, though… Brenly, I remember, but the new guy sounds terribly familiar. Can’t put my finger on it. Seems to have an Al Michaels kind of vibe going. We’ll have to see about him, meantime, there’s always my old friends on radio. I could hear the excitement in Pat’s voice when he opened the broadcast yesterday. I love hearing an announcer who still has a lot of fan in him, instead of the slick polished professional who sucks all the joy and spontaneity out of the game. Are you reading this, Joe Buck?

Keep it up! Let’s go Cubs!